


The Hobbits Of Beacon Hills

by Bam4Me



Category: teen wolf - Fandom
Genre: ... - Freeform, Bottom!Stiles, Cuddling, Dirty Talk?, I have no idea thoughtofthis when half asleep, M/M, Marking, Nerdy Talk?, Other, scott is trying to mark stiles but he keeps getting awak, stiles isa size queen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-02
Updated: 2014-07-02
Packaged: 2018-02-07 04:26:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1885110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bam4Me/pseuds/Bam4Me
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They have a talk about hobbits having sex with humans and it leads to a fisting proposition...?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Hobbits Of Beacon Hills

Stiles pushed Scott's head away from where he was nibbling on Stiles neck, way to sensitive after Derek had slid his fangs in just the day before and wrapped his legs around the blanket they had pushed to the side of the bed, sighing in contentment at his new comfy position.

"If we lived on Arda me and you would be hobbits." Derek lifted his head from Scott's stomach, looking confused.

"Arda?"

Scott tried to get at Stiles' neck again before giving up with a sigh "You mean Middle-Earth? Like Tolkien fiction?"

Stiles nodded. "Yeah. We would totally be hobbits, because you have curly hair and like to eat, and because I'm too adorable to be anything else."

"You wouldn't even want to be an elf or anything?"

"Nah. Hobbits get all the hot people. Besides, if I was a hobbit I could eat seven meals a day."

Derek snorted "You forget to eat one meal a day if we didn't remind you."

"So. If I was a hobbit I could eat seven."

"What is a hobbit anyway?"

Stiles turned to Derek with a betrayed look and Scott looked like he didn't know how to answer that. "You never saw the movies at least?" Scott sounded slightly strangled.

"I barely even know what we're talking about right now."

"You know, Lord of the Rings? The hobbits are the little ones, the ones that are only like three feet tall."

"Oh... Would I be one of those?"

Scott laughed, jostling Derek's head on top of him. "Nah, you would be a ranger. Cause you're scary and bossy."

Derek scowled and slapped Scott's side making him yelp and squirm towards Stiles again. Stiles rolled over and into their arms, excepting his fate as their cuddle-toy. "Don't get smart with me brat. Stiles does it enough without you doing it too."

Scott laughed a bit and slid his fingers into Derek's hair, scratching apologetically at his scalp. "Yes Alpha. I'll remember that, Stiles is the naughty one, not me."

Stiles glared at Scott and pushed him, not moving him at all, but not for lack of trying. It just made Scott laugh harder and Derek smacked Stiles upturned ass, growling at the two of them not to fight.

When they had settled back into quite Derek spoke again "Is a ranger a human?"

"Yeah. But don't worry, they're usually pretty big, and they're almost inhumanly strong, so you don't lose any points on the 'I'll beat your ass' scale."

Derek snorted again "Not why I was asking actually."

Scott went back to trying to mark Stiles again now that he was closer, and Stiles fended him off weakly, letting him suckle on Derek's mark from yesterday with a sigh. "Then why are you asking?"

"Because if you're both hobbits, and I'm a human, I can't have sex with you guys."

Both heads perked up, looking at Derek together "Why not?"

"Well, you said that hobbits are like three feet tall right?" they nod "So that means I'm about twice your height. Not only that but I'm definitely not small in the genital area. So if I was to fuck either of you -but it would have to be Stiles because he's a bigger size queen than you Scott- than my dick would be nearly a third of your body length. That just wouldn't work."

Stiles seemed to ponder this while Scott made a face "... What if the hobbit was into fisting?"

Derek's head lifted, giving Stiles a look that didn't say anything good. "What are you trying to say?"

"Well, if the hobbit was into fisting, than they would already be into having really big things in them, and a hobbit arm would be about the same size as your dick. I could easily take it."

Scott eyed Stiles warily, "Are you trying to say you wanna try fisting?"

Stiles seemed genuinely surprised "I, uh... Sure I guess. Like you said. I am the bigger size queen."


End file.
